My bully can beat up my momma

Daughter 2 came racing down the sidewalk toward the minivan today after school.  There was a boy chasing her.  This is not anything different than any other day.  Daughter 2's a very competitive kid to say the least.  What was different was that the boy was smiling, even though he was losing, and Daughter 2, even though she was winning, was not smiling.


Without even waiting for her sister (who is more than double the size of the boy who was chasing Daughter 2), she jumped into the van and locked the doors.

"That boy," she said breathlessly, "called me the F. B. word.  He called me a F$@%*^ B!+@# - really, Momma."

My chin dropped to my chest as I glanced out the back window just in time to see the kid express his limited vocabulary through his middle finger.

"Do you want me to go talk to him?" I asked her dying to tear into the little terror, but leaving it totally up to the oppressed.

She nodded her little head before offering a final warning, "Be careful, Momma."

I summoned the kid back and threatened calling his momma, his daddy, his grandma, his preacher, his teacher, his principal and even the mayor of little town if he called MY baby or any other momma's baby a name ever again.  When he seemed sufficiently remorseful, if for no other reason than to get me to stop lecturing him on virtuous vocabulary, I sent him on his way with my solemn word that I would be watching him.  I even pointed my two fingers at my eyes then at him to let him know that I meant business.

Scardy cat...

He ran on his weary way home, and I made my way back to the van.  I approached the driver's side and discovered the door was locked, the window was cracked, and Daughter 2 was nervously looking out.

"What are you doing?" I asked as she unlocked the door and let me in.

"Keeping guard."

"Keeping guard?  What does that mean?"

"He's a bully, Momma, and I didn't want him to take you down then come after me."

I laughed! "You don't think I could take of him?"

She looked me up and down and then said, "You are kind of wimpy."

Wasn't so wimpy when I pushed her big head out of my woo-woo...