The Curse of Technology

Since I confessed my love for all things technological, I need to now confess my disdain for the same.

That's right ... As much as I love it, I hate it just as much. I've thought long and hard about why I am apparently a walking oxymoron or paradox or maybe both. And I think it boils down to this: Online, we are too gripe-y.

Today, a hot, trending article popped onto my newsfeed that was titled, "Dear SAHM: Shut Up" or something just as stupid. I didn't even read the article because it had the word Shut Up in it. That's just rude.

If anyone should have to shut up, it's someone telling someone else to shut up. (Did you follow that? I know what I'm trying to say.)

Then, I clicked through to an article about why Megan Trainor's song "All About That Bass" is body shaming. Um ... what? In essence, the author said she was offended because she tried gaining weight and it just didn't work out for her. The line "I ain't no size 2" hurt her heart. I'm not denying her feelings; if she feels that way, she feels that way. The easy thing to do would be to not listen to the song.

I'm typically offended by gangster rap; therefore, I don't listen to it. Ever. But, I'm not going to write an entire blog post about it.

Oh, wait...

See? This is what happens when the internet gets too loud and obnoxious: I become gripe-y as well.

Just think about how wonderful this entire world would be if we got offended at such things as hunger and abuse and homlessness. And, instead of griping about it, we donated food and money and raised awareness and helped a neighbor out.

Is this enough to make me give up my online life. Pffft ... no. I'll just look for the lovely.

Source

The lovely like my friend Jeanabec who just posted tonight a prayer request for a panhandler that was heavy on her heart. She didn't know him, but she wanted us to join her in prayer. Beautiful.

The lovely like my friend Alan who's turned to social media to send healing, comforting thoughts and prayers for his sick brother.

The lovely like my friend Katie who just gave birth to a darling baby girl today.

The lovely like my own kiddo who searches for the perfect quote to accompany her fun pictures on Instagram.

I'm going to sign off now and think about way I can make my little corner of the world lovely.

The Blessing of Technology

I love technology. I love social media. I love the interwebz. Really, I do. I know a lot of people host a lot of disdain for all things techy that distracts us from what's important in our lives, but I am not one of those people.

Thanks to social media, I have been able to stay in touch with cousins that I haven't seen in over twenty-five years.

Thanks to social media, I've gotten sweet friends that I adore and count as close members of my tribe and I met them through the interwebz on one venue or another.

Thanks to technology, I can instantly keep in touch with my long-almost-lost friends with just the taps of a my thumbs.

I have instant information (which isn't always a good thing, but more good than bad) at my fingertips, all because of technology.

Yep. Technology is a blessing to me. I love it all. I love Facebook. I use Twitter, but it's more like my elderly aunt Gloria--I like exchanging recipes and gifts with her on holidays, but I don't wanna go the mall with her. I adore Instagram--I like looking at everyone else's vacation pictures. (Seriously.) I love the notion that I can google any piece of information and find it in the blink of an eye.

Pinterest? Well ... Pinterest has led me down the wrong path one too many times.

I've made a burlap wreath based on Pinterest prompting and it looked like something a donkey hacked up.

I've decorated my home to look like a showcase with the help of Pinterest. It looked like a showcase for a mental institution's art show, but whatevs.

The thing is I know I don't have mad deco skillz--which is why I surfed Pinterest in the first place.

But, tonight, when I attempted to make queso blanca based on Pinterest recipes? Well, let's just say it wasn't my finest moment in the kitchen. 

source

Here's what you need to know:

-The five minute recipe took me over a half-hour.
-The half-and-half to cheese-ratio was way off; therefore, I made about four gallon when all was said and done.
-I cursed like a sailor, and I'm not (too) ashamed of it.
-I contemplated throwing the entire pot of the cheesey-sauce-gone-wrong out of my front window ... and the window was closed at the time

Pinterest? We're breaking up. No one makes my cheese look bad ... not even Pinterest.

20 Freezer Meals for $100 in my Dirty Kitchen!

I've seen all of you Pinning and sharing on Facebook those posts that claim they made a gazillion meals for their freezer for $5 in four minutes or whatever. I didn't pay too much attention to the titles. But they did appeal to me for several reasons:

1. I love freezer meals.
2. I love saving money.
3. I just might be a foodie blogger deep down in my soul.

So, I spent the week scouring over these blog posts that claimed to have made a bajillion meals for next to nothing in their nice and tidy kitchens. I loved the ready-made shopping lists and their "dump it" attitude for their crock-pot meals. But, none of the lists had a fool-proof menu for my very picky family.

So I did it myself.

That's right. I collected recipes (and made up some new ones) and then made my own shopping list. I spent $100 on a month's worth of crock-pot meal groceries and then came home and made twenty-meals for my freezer. Here's what I learned.

I didn't need to clean my kitchen before beginning the process.

This was my entire--ENTIRE--work space.

I needed a Sharpie that worked to write on the freezer bags. (Some of these meals will be pleasant surprises.)

I did twenty meals, two loads of laundry and cleaned the kitchen afterwards (without a dishwasher, even!) in under two hours.

And, I carried on a running commentary as if I were narrating my actions for a TV show, a la Rachael Ray.

So, while I'm not a food blogger, I'd like to offer to you, my valued readers, how I made twenty freezer meals in two hours for $100.

Please know that I precooked nothing. Nothing at all. I dumped all the ingredients into a freezer bag, labeled them (well, the first three, then the Sharpie dried out). I chopped the onions, peppers, carrots, cabbage, whatever, as I needed them.

Seriously, I did it without cleaning my kitchen, 

but it might have been nice to have some space while I was working

And, it's important to note that I totally made up some of these recipes based on what I had in my kitchen already.

It's also important to note that I had much of the meat already because I buy it then go out to eat. I can't explain it either.

It's also, also important to note that while I play a foodie on the blogosphere, I am not one it real life--my recipes may be lacking, but you are creative persons. I have faith you can make it work!

Dump these in the crockpot and cook em for about six hours. Let's all hope for the best.

~*~

    1. BBQ CHICKEN 

      4 boneless skinless chicken breasts

    ground pepper

    chunky applesauce (gross, I used regular ol' smooth applesauce)

    BBQ sauce (just squirt some in--however much you want)

    brown sugar

    cumin, 'cause everything's better with cumin

2. MAPLE CHICKEN                        

      Chicken thighs (or tenderloins)

    some Dijon Mustard or regular mustard with some Italian dressing because that's what you have

    Maple Syrup

    sliced oninos

 3. Pork Loin

     A pork loin that was in your freezer when you bought it on sale this summer

     one sliced onion

     Cumin

     Garlic

     onion powder

     parsley

     broth that you found in your freezer after making a roast last month

4. Chicken Tacos                

Taco seasoning packet (then fill the packet with water and

Ranch seasoning packet

chicken breasts

sliced onion

Rotel

olive oil

5. Orange Chicken                          

some chicken

some olive oil

2 oranges, sliced in half

orange juice--like count to six while you're pouring it

half a bottle of terriaki sauce that you thought was soy sauce in the fridge

           

6. Beef Bits                          

cubed beef (stew meat) or meatballs

Dry Onion Soup packet

1 can of whatever kind of cream of soup you like

broth--however much it takes to cover the meatballs or less than that

7. Meatloaf or sloppy joes (with meatballs)

2 pounds ground beef (or turkey) OR, meatballs (seeing a theme, here?)

chopped green bell pepper (not much, we like the flavor but not the taste)

garlic powder

mustard

ketchup

brown sugar

cabbage

black pepper

(eggs and oats for meatloaf)

PEPPERS for Stuffed Peppers (If I weren't using meatballs, I would have made this into stuffed peppers--yum! But we wouldn't have eaten the peppers; we'd have just enjoyed the taste.)

8. Lasagne

            Pasta

Cottage cheese

Marainara

Mozzarella

Meatballs

9. Hobo Meals

            Hamburger Patties

            Broth

            Gravy

            Onions & peppers, stirfry frozen (or not)

Carrots

Cabbage

10. Pork Chops

pork chops

mustard

garlic powder

EVOO

cream of chicken soup and some water or milk to clean out the can

11. Chicken Parmesan

Chicken

Marinara

Parmesan

12. Scalloped Potatoes with Ham

3 lbs potatoes - peeled, thinly sliced (This sounded good that the time)

shredded cheddar cheese

ham

2 cans cream of whatever soup

 milk to rinse the cans out

 garlic powder

pepper

13. Ham and Cheese casserole

Tator tots

4 eggs
 with  2 cups of milk, beaten together

 cheddar cheese, shredded


ham, chopped
 (or not)

 parsley


 salt


 pepper


 paprika


14. Swiss chicken

1 package stuffing mix

4 chicken breasts (boneless & skinless)

some swiss cheese

cream of whatever soup and milk to rinse the can out

15. Turkey and Tortellini

turkey Italian sausage

Marinara

Totellini

Onions and peppers

16. BBQ Pork - 

pork chops

15 ounce can of pineapples, undrained

BBQ sauce

17. Enchilada

Chicken tenderloins

Enchilada sauce

sliced onion

sliced pepper

black beans, drained and rinsed

Corn

Rotel 

           

18. PORK CHOPS 2-3 pounds of Pork Chops

 Romano (already grated) cheese

local honey (local is the best!)

soy sauce (except I used the rest of the teryaki sauce

 Basil

 garlic

EVOO

19. Bacon Wrapped Pork or chicken

            Ribs or chicken

            Bacon

            Brown sugar

            Pepper

20.  Cheeseburger casserole

            1 lb hamburger or ... leftover Taco meat that was in your freezer

            Diced tomatoes

            Ketchup

            Mustard

            Pickles

            Onions

            Tater tots

            Shredded cheese

Meat:

24 chicken breasts or 72 tenderloins

Pork roast

Meatballs (or stew meat or round steak), 3

Patties, 6

Pork Chops, 16

Ham (buy the spiral ham bits and pieces--OMG! YUM!)

Italian sausage

Ground beef (or meatballs) (I had a gob of meatballs--I used them all! D1 doesn't eat red meat, so this will make it easy for her to pick them out and easy for me to fork them off of her plate and into my mouth)

Fruits & Veggies:

Rotel, 2

Oranges

Green peppers-3 (I only used one ... not sure what happened here ...)

Shredded cabbage (or cabbage) (by the shredded, trust me)

Marinara, 3

Onions and peppers stir fry (or, you can forget to buy these and just slice up your own)

Carrots

Onions, 5

Potatoes, 3 lb (seriously? Not sure why I thought I'd slice these myself--do yourself a favor and buy some kind of frozen potatoes)

Crushed pineapples

Black beans

corn

can of tomatoes, 2 

Starch:

Pasta, 2

Tater tots, 2 (or one really large one)

Stuffing mix

Dairy:

eggs

Cottage Cheese

Parmesan cheese

Cheddar cheese, 4 c

Swiss cheese, 1 c

Milk

Romano Cheese (I couldn't find this--I used Parmesan instead. Same dif, right?)

Pantry:

Soy sauce

Honey

Enchilada sauce

Broth (do not buy stock--that's poison. Broth is real, yo.)

Brown gravy mix

Applesauce

BBQ sauce

Brown sugar

Mustard

Ketchup

pickles

Syrup

Mushrooms

Taco seasoning packet

Ranch Dressing

Orange Juice

Worcestershire

Dry onion soup

Cream of Mushroom, 3 (for some reason, I really needed 4)

Garlic Powder

Oats (unless you make meatloaf, you won't need these--I used meatballs because I had a weird collection of meatballs in my freezer)

EVOO

Spices:

Pepper

Basil

Mustard

Garlic powder

Salt

Onion powder

Coriander (this was $8! No way! I didn't use it)

Parsley

Chipotle

Cumin

My Favorite Things: Goodness

This week's events involving Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson, GQ, and A & E have taken the top news slots on local and nationwide news venues. It's occupied 90% of my social media feeds, and it's a headliner of dozens of magazines in the checkout line.

Also this week, South Sudanese rebels kept US citizens from leaving their war-ravaged country, there was a(nother) deadly school shooting in Colorado, and US Troops were killed in action in Afghanistan.

Still, the top story was the whole Duck Dynasty /A & E diatribe.

I really have nothing to say about the aforementioned debacle--everything's already been said. I do however want to share some good news with you:  

Goodness is still happening.

A stranger paid off $10,000 worth of Kmart layaways for strangers this week because he wanted to.

Seventh grade students collected boxes full of goodies to send to Afghanastan, specifically to two of their classmates's dads who are deployed there.

An individual found himself with an unneeded trailer home, fully furnished, and gave it to a homeless family.

Goodness and good news exist.  This week when my faith calls me to celebrate the Good News incarnate, I'm choosing to look for goodness. 

It will not be found on the television nor the news papers and probably not in my Facebook newsfeed. But, I'm confident in the fact that I will find goodness in my life. I hope you find it in your life this week, too.

Dang It, Facebook!

So, I have a friend. Actually I have a lot of them, so there. I heard what y'all were thinking. Oh ... you have A friend? Just one? WOW! How'd you score that one friend? 

And? Maybe I spend way too much time with adolescents. Let me start over.

I was perusing Facebook the other day in a successful attempt to avoid obligations like laundry and grocery shopping when I came upon a recipe that one of my many, many, many friends had shared on her wall. This particular recipe was so easy. Basically, it called for two items: tater tots and a waffle iron.

When I finally got around to buying groceries, I picked up a bag of tater tots because what could be easier than putting tater tots on my waffle iron? Nothing. Nothing could be easier. Except opening a bag a meatballs and pouring Golden Mushroom soup over them--another genius Facebook find.

That evening, I poured my soup over the meatballs and turned on my waffle iron.

When the soup was bubbling, I tossed the tots onto the waffle iron and attempted to close the lid so I could flip it over and let it do its thing. At least, I assumed that's what I was supposed to do because here's the thing. I didn't read the recipe.

You aren't surprised at all, are you?

So, I squeezed the handles together in an attempt to get the lid to close. Sixty full seconds later, I got the lid closed and the iron flipped.

Then, while I waited, I looked up exercises to increase arm strength. Holy Moly, but Momma's outta shape.

Then I waited. And I waited. And I turned off the meatball soup concoction because it was starting to stick.

And I waited some more and some more, and I tasted the meatballs because I was getting hungry.

And about two hours later, give or take an hour and forty-five minutes, my ready light turned green. I flipped the iron and beheld my ... lame ol' tater tots.

They looked nothing like Facebook. And they were way more work (remember all the squeezing and waiting I had to do?).

They ate the very same way, though.

Comments I Wanna Post But I Won't 'Cause I'm Nice. Dammit.

I'm tired. I'll admit it. Momma loves her sleep and for the past two weeks, we've been getting to bed late and waking up early. This morning was the first morning that I've really gotten to wake up when I wanted to in a very long time.

It's June. I sleep late in June. Not sleeping late is not good for my mind.

Better than Facebook

The Dad and I may be the meanest parents ever, if you ask Daughter 1 why she doesn't have her own Facebook.  I have several very valid reasons why she can't have her own Facebook account.  For starters, she's not old enough. And there are so many people and posts and pictures that I just don't want her exposed to. Plus, it may be the last place on Earth that I'm can be without The Daughters intruding.  Seriously. I'll bet it's been a good four years since I've even gotten to pee by myself.  But I digress.